After a brief hiatus for February break, I am back!
After my last blog on minding my own business, a few things popped up reminding me that not only should I keep in my own lane, but also what people think about me is also none of my business. I have to be careful to not allow others to cross over into the median on my side of the street. What others think about me has nothing to do with my value or worth.
I am ashamed to admit it, but I am extremely insecure. I worry all the time about what others think about me. I worry not only about how I look but also about others’ opinions of me. If someone does not like me for whatever reason it is, I will obsess about what I can do to make them like me. If there are hundred people in a room and four don’t like me, I will obsess on those four instead of the ninety-six others that do. It is something that I have struggled with my whole life and honestly, it is just now in my 57th (yikes) year that I am finally working through it. I’m in awe of my daughter Molly, she has confidence I’m still trying to get. I remember there was someone in her school who did not like her. When I asked her about it, she said to me “they don’t like me, I don’t know what’s wrong with them.” It never dawned on her to blame herself. What they thought about her was of no concern to her. I was blown away.
The bottom line is that what someone thinks about us is none of our business and no matter how many likes we get or don’t get on a picture we post on Facebook, others’ validation or lack of has absolutely nothing to do with our value.
I heard this story once a while ago. A young boy goes to visit his Grandfather. His Grandfather had this gorgeous old classic car in his garage. The boy loved it and his Grandfather said the car is yours. The boy was overwhelmed and asked his Grandfather how much the car is worth. The Grandfather said why don’t you bring it to the Pawnshop in town and see how much they will give you for it. The Pawnshop offered him $750.00. Then the Grandfather told him to go to the used car lot in town. They offered him $1500.00. The Grandfather then told him to go to the Classic Car Show in town. They offered him $30,000.00! The Grandfather then said to his grandson, the car is worth a different amount to different people. It does not matter what others think the car is worth, what matters is what you think the car is worth. What you think is all that matters.
When I am consumed with what others think about me then I am relinquishing control of my own thoughts and actions. What I need to do is stop worrying about pleasing others and concentrate on making myself happy. What I think about myself is what is most important and the key to my happiness.
“What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life.” – Deepak Chopra
Accidental Harmony 