Hanging on through the holidays………..

**This blog was written before the untimely death of DJ Stephen “tWitch” Boss. Please keep in mind that we truly do not know what people are going through, please spread kindness!

This is a different type of blog than I usually do. I have not written in the last couple of weeks, I just was not in the mindset – and that is ok.

The holidays are always a tough time of year. I absolutely love Christmas and as we all know, Hallmark movies, but the pressure of having to be happy during the holidays can be a bit overwhelming.

So many people I know personally are struggling right now. Whether it is taking care of a sick or elderly family member, death of someone close, divorce or other family issues; it seems like everyone I know is struggling with something and having to be celebrating the holidays just seems to add to the pressure.

As we are shopping and running errands this holiday season, please keep in mind that we do not know what is going on behind the scenes with anyone. Even people who are smiling might be struggling with something that they are hiding.

Here are just a few tips to help you handle the pressure of the holidays:

Acknowledge how you are feeling: If you are feeling sad, depressed or overwhelmed, acknowledge it. Don’t try to hide or stuff your feelings. Say it out loud to yourself or someone else. By allowing yourself to feel, it actually lessens the load.

Reach out: Reach out to others, not only for yourself but for them. I tend to isolate. When something is bothering me or making me sad, I will retreat and wallow. By forcing myself to reach out to someone else and share how I am feeling, it gets me outside myself. Also, reach out to others. Like I’ve said, we do not know what others have going on. Reach out and ask someone how they are doing, smile and wish them a good day and most importantly, be kind. A little bit of kindness goes a long way.

Be realistic: Do not put unrealistic expectations on yourself. By doing that you just end up disappointing yourself. Know your limitations and accept what you can and cannot do. Also remember that it is ok to not do it all.

Learn to say no: One of the most valuable things I have learned in my life is that no is a complete sentence. No explanation is needed. If you don’t want to do something or cannot do something, say it. For years, I would say yes for fear of disappointing someone and then not only get mad at myself for not saying how I feel but then also resentful for the others that asked. I now know that they are allowed to ask and I am allowed to say “No, I’m so sorry I can’t do that.”

Take a breath: If you find yourself harried and rushed, stop and breathe. The holidays are not a marathon. One of my favorite things to do is to get a holiday latte from Starbucks and drive around in my car listening to Christmas music.

Give yourself a break this holiday season because this is the time of year to rejoice and celebrate despite what else we might have going on.